41 - What to Do if You Think Your Child Might Be Neurodivergent? 06/05/24

Here's what to expect on the podcast:

• Various signs that may indicate a child is neurodivergent.

• What are the steps involved in seeking professional evaluation for your child?

• Helpful resources for parents with neurodivergent kids.

• Katie Beckett's Medicaid Program, how it works, and how to apply.

• And much more!

Resources:

Free PDF- How to get a Diagnosis: https://www.boisemusictherapycompany.com/get-diagn…

How to Positively Parent Your Neurodivergent Child: https://www.boisemusictherapycompany.com/parenting

Connect with Samantha Foote!

Website: www.boisemusictherapycompany.com

Email: [email protected]

Consultation: https://letsmeet.io/boisemusictherapycompany/30-mi…

TRASCRIPTION

This podcast is for parents like you, navigating the world of neurodiversity with love and compassion. I'm a neurodivergent mother of three amazing neurodivergent children and a board certified music therapist. Our mission is to create a supportive space where you feel understood, connected, and inspired.

With practical tips, strategies, and resources, we'll help you and your child thrive in your unique way. Join us as we dive deep into the diverse world of neurodivergent individuals, exploring topics like ADHD, autism, dyslexia, sensory processing challenges, and more. We'll cover it all to empower, educate, and uplift both neurodivergent individuals and those who walk alongside them.

Together, we'll create a world where every brain is valued and celebrated. We're excited to embark on this enlightening journey with you. We are your hosts, Samantha Fuh and Lauren Ross, and this is the Every Brain is Different podcast.

Welcome to the Every Brain is Different podcast, and we are doing a solo episode today. Talking about what you should do if you suspect your child might be neurodivergent. So, once again, neurodivergence is like ADHD, autism, other things like dyslexia, dysgraphia, sensory processing disorder, any of those.

Uh, so, some things that might indicate Yeah, all the things. Things that might indicate that you might want to get something done is if You know, your child acts like they're in their own world, they don't respond to others when you call their name, um, they don't speak as well as their peers, they seem to be bothered by, like, sensory input, or they need sensory input, so they're spinning constantly, they're running constantly, they can, they just never feel like they can be at rest.

And then, um, have repetitive or unusual behaviors, they lack sustained attention in task or fun activities. Um, another thing is exhibiting poor listening skills, um, failure to follow through on tasks and instructions. You know, and this depends on their age. So, I mean, if your kid is one, and they don't follow through on tasks and instructions, then that That's not really a cause for concern, but if they're like nine and they can't follow instructions, there might be some cause for concern.

Yeah, there you go. Basically, it boils down to if they don't meet developmental milestones appropriately. And that doesn't necessarily mean they have a diagnosis. Yeah. I know sometimes we get worried like, oh, there's something wrong with my kid or whatever. And it could just be maybe in that one area they just need extra support.

So. But, and oftentimes it does lead to a diagnosis, and that's okay too. Yeah, for sure. Like, just because they're not making eye contact, because I know that's, I don't agree with that being like a super big indicator of autism, but just because they're not making eye contact doesn't mean they have autism.

You know? Yeah. Just because they're not smiling when they're two months old doesn't mean they have autism. That was one thing that my child's doctor said to me when he was two months old was, Oh, he's not smiling, um, he might have autism, which he did turn out to have autism, so maybe that's a bad example.

But you don't count that one doesn't count, but I'm just saying like, it was just something that we were watching. He didn't like get the diagnosis at two months old, you know, like, Hey, just be aware that this is a sign, you know, but the first thing that I suggest doing, if you notice any of those things in your kid is just contacting your pediatrician.

So they should be able to refer you. to a developmental pediatrician or a psychologist who can do diagnostic testing because Pediatricians can diagnose like ADHD, but they can't diagnose autism or sensory processing disorder or anything like that. Um, because they're just not qualified. So, Angie. So, if you go to your pediatrician, they can refer you out for diagnostic testing.

And if they say, oh no, your child doesn't have autism, they're fine. Um, you can still ask for a referral because, once again, they are not qualified to diagnose autism. So I've heard a parent of that happening to parents. They're like, well, my pediatrician said it's fine, but I really think something's going on.

I was like, then ask for the referral and get the testing done. So, they can, something cool though, is they can give you a global delay diagnosis and that can help you get like Medicaid resources and other resources that you can't get without a diagnosis. So if you're, if you want to access, like in Idaho, if you want to access the Developmental Disability Waiver for Medicaid, the Katie Beckett Waiver.

Um, you can do that before age five with just, uh, like developmental delay diagnosis. We are getting ahead of ourselves because we'll talk about that later. Slow your roll, Sam. I know. I get, I just get so excited about things. Um, but yeah, so sometimes. The testing waitlist can be years long, um, so you want to get on multiple lists and call them like once a month or once a week, whatever you want to do, and just say, Hey, am I still on the waitlist?

Where am I on the waitlist? Because sometimes. They will just take you off the waitlist and not tell you. I have heard of that happening too. So, get on the waitlist in multiple places and then, and then follow up with them. Because, sometimes, weird things happen and you just get kicked off. So. Or they lose your paperwork.

Or they do lose your paperwork. That has happened too. Um, but be persistent. That is the number one thing that I recommend to parents who are trying to navigate the medical system. Just be persistent because sometimes you'll get brushed off. Sometimes you'll be like, oh, that doesn't matter. Whatever. Um, but yeah, I just always tell parents be persistent.

And, you know. Be annoying if you have to. I don't care. Bee's a squeaky wheel.

So, if you notice something is up with your kid, definitely talk to the pediatrician, be persistent, get the referrals. But there are different things you can do based on their age. If they're under three, Every state in the United States has like a zero to three program, early intervention program, I, it's different, called different things in different states.

Um, in Idaho, it's called the infant toddler program. And basically what you do is it's under health and welfare so you can just contact your health and welfare department and ask for an evaluation. And they come out and they do an evaluation on like speech skills, communication, motor skills. Um, socialization, all those different things.

And if they find that they, your child needs some help in that area, then they will send a developmental therapist out to your house free of charge. The whole program is free. And basically they just teach the parents what to do with the kid to enhance the skills that they're working on. So, they come.

With, with different skills, so my developmental therapist is more of a general therapist, but they still help with speech and motor and all those different skills. If after a certain period of time your child still isn't making progress, then they'll send out like a speech therapist, occupational therapist, a physical therapist, um, any one of those people to work on the different skills that your child needs to To develop so and all three of my kids went through that program.

I loved it. They were very helpful one of the therapists actually even noticed that the reason why my son wasn't talking was because he had a tongue tie and it had been missed by So many doctors and she was like, I really think he has a tongue tie and that's why he's not talking So I'll be forever grateful for her because he had a severe tongue tie.

That's crazy. It was missed by so many people Yeah, yeah, he wasn't that happens Yeah, yeah, I mean it happens. It's they definitely were focused on other things with him because he had so many other issues Like I don't really blame them for missing it. But um, he wasn't making he wasn't even making sounds Before they fixed it and after they fixed his tongue, he just like exploded, but we had no idea what he was saying because he hadn't developed, you know, the speech and so proper language.

It's taken five years. But he's finally, like, on the last leg of speech therapy, so that's cool. Um, but yeah, so that's what you can do before your child turns three, and then after your child is three, if they're between the ages of three and five, they can qualify for developmental preschool through The school district.

So just call your local school district and say, Hey, I would like an evaluation and they will evaluate your child to be eligible to see if they're eligible for the developmental preschool. The only bad thing about this is that your child has to be like in the bottom seven percentile. And so that's really hard to qualify for for a lot of kids.

I mean, you don't want them like to qualify. You know, to be in that area if that's where they don't need to be, but my son was like the 8th, in the 8th percentile, and so he missed it by one point. So that was really frustrating because he's not really He wasn't, uh, appropriate for like a typical preschool, but he couldn't go to the developmental preschool, you know?

So luckily we found there's, there's private preschools that you can go to. I know a lot of like ABA centers have preschools if you want to go there. And so you get ABA therapy while you're in preschool. Another option that we did was my son got speech therapy, and he went to a speech therapy school. And so he got speech therapy while he was in the preschool.

And they did like normal preschool stuff, but he just got the extra support that he needed there. Awesome. Yeah. So many helpful things out there. Yeah, yeah. So, those are all things you can do before you even get a diagnosis. And another thing you can do is join local, like, autism or ADHD groups on Facebook.

Like, there's a lot of parent groups that you can join and you can ask questions. And people are so helpful in those groups. They, you don't have to have, like, an official diagnosis. You just say, hey, you can just join them and not say anything, you know? Like, you don't have to post. But, um, just getting the support from there is, has been really beneficial for me.

And then something else you can do is we actually offer, Boise Music Therapy offers a parent support group. So we teach positive parenting strategies and we also educate on the, you know, neurodivergent terms, acronyms. Things that you might not be aware of like Masking or sensory issues or what does all the things mean you like, right?

we have that and you can Just go to Boise music therapy company or every brand is different calm and You can see what we offer. Hey there, it's Samantha. Are you a dedicated parent overwhelmed with navigating the unique challenges of raising a neurodivergent child? You find it tough to understand impulsive behaviors, manage transitions, address educational concerns, handle sensory stimulation, and navigate social interaction struggles.

The good news is you aren't alone. Here at Every Brain is Different, we're excited to announce our new membership program. Parenting your neurodivergent child. This is a community of parents working to enhance connections with their kids and gain a deeper understanding of their unique needs. With expert insights on positive parenting strategies and neuroaffirming practices, you will have concrete strategies to help your child succeed.

You'll have opportunities to ask questions, hear from other parents, and feel empowered as a parent and finally feel peace in your home. Join us on the second and third Thursdays of each month on Zoom. Visit www. everybrainisdifferent. com for more details. Let's embark on this journey together. I encourage that parents like do something like this and what you offer, because I think sometimes when we have kids and they have a diagnosis and they're going to therapies and all of that stuff, and therapists are working with them, but sometimes it's not generalized at home because the parents don't know.

Um, and so I think it's really beneficial for parents to. Kind of take parenting classes like that, um, to get that information, get those skills, um, so that it, yes, they're doing great in therapy, but then they also can, can start being great at home. So, yeah, I think definitely it's amazing. Well, thank you.

Thank you. Shameless plug for the program, but really like parents don't get a lot of support. They don't get taught. about neurodivergent things a lot. It depends on the therapist that you have, um, for like different therapies. But I've had therapists where my, they take my kid back into therapy and then they bring them out and they don't tell me anything that goes on.

And I don't recommend having therapists like that because you need to know what's going on so you can work at home. But then I've had therapists that have been like, Oh, we worked on this and this and here's a handout for things that you can do at home, which is very beneficial. But also, like, the community is just to support parents, just, you know, to provide.

Um, positive parenting strategies that work for neurodivergent kids. You know, we talk about PDA, which is, which is pathological demand avoidance, which is a profile within autism. Because parenting neurodivergent kids is different than parenting neurotypical kids. Like there's just different things at work.

And I know since I've changed my parenting to be more neurodivergent affirming or friendly, I guess you could say. I have gotten some judgment from people and so just having that support that's like, no, you're doing the right thing. You know, you're their parent. You can decide what's the right thing. Um, I think it's just beneficial.

Yeah. And you're going to know your kid best. Yeah, for sure. No judging people. Yeah. It's different. Yeah, for sure. Everything can work for different people, different families, situations. Don't judge. Yeah. Unless a child is being hurt, don't judge. Don't worry about it. It's fine. Yeah. Yeah. So, okay. What happens?

After you get a diagnosis is what I want to talk about next, and just some resources that your doctor might not tell you about. Because I know when my oldest son got diagnosed, I specifically asked what resources are available. And she said, you don't need anything. It's fine. He's fine. You'll be fine. And I'm like, uh, okay.

And then I was coming, I didn't tell her where I worked. I didn't tell her that I worked in the field and I knew the resources because I just wanted to see what she would offer parents, you know? And she, she did hand me a pamphlet about a genetic study that they were doing and she was like, here's, um, a pamphlet for this study.

Um, you can join it and help them out if you want to. And then she did hand me the first hundred days. after diagnosis from the Autism Society. So, I did get that stuff, but it was not very helpful. But then, on the other side of it, when my other two were diagnosed, I got all the things. And it was kind of overwhelming.

So, um, these are just some things that I would recommend. Um, definitely get an occupational therapy. Um, evaluation because occupational therapists can work on a lot of things that you might not know about. I know that I didn't think my kids needed occupational therapy and then we got an evaluation and she helps them with like sensory things and regulation, like self regulation.

Managing their behavior, managing their moods, like a bunch of different things. And she has been amazing for my kids. Um, you can also get like a behavioral therapy evaluation, speech therapy evaluation. And you don't have to do these therapies. I just think it's beneficial to get the evaluation just to see if there's things that they can work on that you might not be aware of.

So, the other thing, and you don't have to have a diagnosis for this, but you can get an IEP or a 504 accommodation plan at school. And that just puts into place certain things that the school has to do to accommodate your child. So, like, they might need extra time for testing. They might need to be in a different room for testing.

They might need the teacher. I know one of the things that my kid has is that his teacher spends two minutes alone with him every day just having a conversation to build a better connection with his teacher. Or he's allowed to leave the classroom and go for a walk if he needs to. Or he's allowed to have like sensory putty.

Putty, um, and things like that. So those are some things that you can have for an IEP. And the IEP too will give you services at school. So they can get like behavioral services, speech therapy, occupational therapy, physical therapy, all those different therapies at school. Um, you can actually get music therapy at school too if you get an assessment for it, but the schools tend to fight that.

So you just have to once again be persistent if you want that. So that's the name of the game persistence. Um, but the biggest thing, yeah, the biggest thing that I don't think gets talked about is the Katie Beckett program. And it's very misunderstood. So it's a Medicaid program that I think is in every state.

I know it's in Idaho for sure, but I think it's in every state in some form. And you can get on this program based on diagnosis. It's not based on your income. So if you're on this program, Then you have, you, um, can get all your medical care paid for, so that includes like, you know, doctors, um, all the traditional therapies like speech therapy, occupational therapy, physical therapy, behavioral therapy.

You have to get ABA if you get behavioral therapy, that's the only, um, well, not for Medicaid.

Not for Medicaid, I guess. Um, private insurance only pays for ABA, but Medicaid will pay for some other types. So I, it's been amazing for my family. And it, some questions that I've heard about it is, does it affect taxes? It does not affect your taxes. It doesn't count as income. It doesn't put you in a different tax bracket.

Um, it just pays for your You know, medical expenses, which I think my family would be bankrupt if we didn't have Medicaid and the Katie Beckett program. Because, you know, like, once a week therapies, I have three kids, they all go to occupational therapy. Some of them go to speech therapy, they all have behavioral therapy.

That adds up, and that adds up quick. And then, like, my other son, he has like a bunch of medical issues on top of that. So, it's just It's been very awesome to have that resource. So all you have to do to get on that, well not all, it's kind of a process, but you have to, I would just call Health and Welfare in your state, ask about the Katie Beckett Program for Developmental Disabilities.

You have to get denied Medicaid and then you apply for the Katie Beckett Program. So we just filled out an application for the Developmental Disability Program. And once again, be persistent, because the first time I applied for my middle son, he He didn't get denied. I just never heard back from them.

And so I called, and they're like, Oh yeah, this person has his application. No, this person has his application. No, this person has his application. And then I finally called the last person, and they're like, Yeah, we lost his application. So they didn't, like, deny him. They just lost it. And I'm like, how did she lose it?

But, so things like that can happen. And then I've also heard people get denied, and then you have to apply again, and then you get it the second time you apply. So just because you get denied the first time, don't be afraid to apply again. I mean, if you apply, like, multiple times, maybe you should stop if you keep getting denied.

Because it is diagnosis based, it is need based. So, it's not based on your income, but it is based on your children's needs. And so, like in Idaho, we have to fill out the Vineland assessment. It's just an assessment to say what, you know, what your child, what your child can do. And it's kind of depressing to fill out because you have to say that your child can't do a lot of things.

But the important thing to remember when you're doing assessments like this is to answer it like your child is by themselves. They're not receiving any support, and can they do what they are being asked to do? Yes, I, a lot of times parents like fudge a little bit, like they can do that, and it's no shame if they can't.

Like, it's not a reflection on you as a parent or anything like that, but if you want your kid to get the help that they need and the support that they need, you have to be honest on those assessments. Yeah, and I'm not going to lie, they're really long assessments, and they're, Really depressing because you're like is my child and they don't tell you if your child's actually supposed to do that They just ask if your child can do that.

Like they ask the same questions for two year olds and 15 year olds, you know So I'm like, are they supposed to do that? Like I don't know so it's just But that's where I've seen people get denied, people that should have the program and should be approved, they get denied because they kind of fudge on that assessment.

They're like, oh yeah, my kid can do that. And in their head, they're like, well, he can do that. He just needs like verbal assistance or physical assistance. And what they're asking is, can they do it with no assistance? So, that is all my recommendations. If you think your child might be neurodivergent, um, if this was all very overwhelming and you have questions, We do have a free download that you can download, um, and it has all this information on it, or you can just, um, shoot me an email and, or DM us on Instagram, and I will send you this PDF.

Um, it just is literally, like, everything that you can do if you think your child might be neurodivergent. You know, so you can go to everybrainisdifferent. com, it can be found there, it can be found at BoiseMusicTherapyCompany. com or you can just email me, shoot us a DM and we will make sure you get it because hearing all this might be a little overwhelming and it might be easier to look at it.

I don't know how you learn. Just remember there's help out there, there's support out there. Be persistent. It'll all be okay. It will take time. We will be here to support you. Yeah, if you have any questions, just, we're always here. You can shoot us an email, DM, whatever. And let us know what else you'd like to learn about.

Like, what questions do you have about the neurodivergent community? I know we had some questions. About, um, dyslexia, and so we're going to have someone come on and talk about that. And we have some questions about mental illness, um, in kids and adults who are neurodivergent. So, like comorbidity with that.

So we're going to talk about that in a future episode. Um, yeah, just let us know what you want to learn about and we will do our best to find the answer or find a guest to speak about it. Yep. Okay. Let us know what you think of this and we'll be back next week with another guest. Thanks, guys.

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Fascinating world of neurodiversity. Click the link in our show notes to visit our website for a free download of three tips for a stronger relationship with your child.